Where do I start? Well it all started Wednesday December 28th around 5:30 am... I wasn't exactly sure what was going on, but I knew I was hurting...fast forward to 7:25 pm...and our sweet little girl was here...words can't describe how I felt...if your a mother, you know... The minute I saw her I was changed for good...forever...we came home the next night and for some crazy reason decided we could do it alone... Mom offered to stay, but we both said "no it's ok we'll be fine"... Which now I know wasn't exactly right...it was by far the scariest night of my life... New things are scary, and neither of us had a clue.. I prayed all night... Really...without stopping...when the sun came up I realized we made it... I felt so much better...for the next few days we were surrounded by our friends and family...which was wonderful...the biggest thing I have learned through this entire experience is that my parents are my rock...I have needed them more in the last week than ever...I also now know how much they love Hannah and I...and I finally get it...or I think I do...it's a lot to take in...my mother has always been my best friend, but I wouldn't have made it this week without her...
It's so true that you develop a love for your spouse that is so much stronger after a baby...instantly my love for Tyler multiplied by 100...I tell him every night that I couldn't do this without him... And I truly mean that...our 4th night home I decided to go to the living room to feed Liza in the middle of the night and stay in there instead of wake Tyler..I knew he was tired and he had to work the next day...that was one of the hardest nights...I later realized that it was bc I felt alone...as crazy as it sounds, he wasn't next to me and it made a difference...
We,ve been home with Liza for 10 nights now and every day things seem easier...I've prayed more in the past 10 days than I have in a long time...I've never loved someone so much...I could sit ans stare at her for hours...actually some days I do...I knew this would be a hard job...but I had no clue...becoming a mother has been the most rewarding yet scariest experiences of my life...I don't wanna mess up, and that's what makes it hard...I feel so so lucky to have her...my own little girl...who looks just like her daddy (which is just wonderful)...please continue praying for all 3 of us as we continue this wonderful journey...with love- Liza's mom
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You certainly would have me fooled. It appears that it comes natural. You and Tyler are doing a great job. You made the comment that you have never worried so much and I want you to know that your worries multiply with each child and grandchild.
ReplyDeleteIt really does make u appreciate ur parents more. You hear your whole life how a baby is a gift.... And think ok whatever... Then it happens, you go omg now I know what they meant. Also, the word unconditional love takes a whole new meaning. I'm so proud for u spence. Your an awesome mommy. I know she is just as blessed to have u as u are to have her! :)) <3
ReplyDeleteSpencer, this is just beautiful! I had tears running down my face when I finished reading it! It brings back so many memories for me! God knows exactly what we need and when we need it. Our children are no exception to this. He knew that Liza needed you and Tyler and no one else! And He knew that you and Tyler needed her! He is just wonderful like that! I remember looking down at Jackson when he was about a week old and feeling so overwhelmed even though I had all kinds of help and support, it still scared me to think what a responsibility I now had taking care of this tiny helpless baby. The best advise I can give you is just take each day one at a time and cherish the moment; everything else will take care of itself!
ReplyDelete